so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
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