toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize