i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
This is classic penis vs brain.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
