Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
