we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I think I just shit out all my problems.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
