dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
