mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
