I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
