You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
