I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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