There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
