operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
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