come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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