:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
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