did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
