Me. At least after what I've been through.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
