And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Randomize
