There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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