You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
