I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
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