No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Send help, water and tortillas.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
