I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
my poor anus
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
