New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Randomize
