Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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