I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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