I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize