we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
