I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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