Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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