If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
Randomize
