we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
