My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Randomize
