those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
That reminds me...we need to get swords
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
