Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize