Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize
