You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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