You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
