Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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