His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
