I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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