Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
