i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize
