The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
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