I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
