Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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