We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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