trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
