Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Randomize
