I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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