go do what you do best...puke behind churches
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
and she was petting her beer can
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
