The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Barsexuality is the new black.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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